WELCOME

President Jeff Hagstrom welcomed all to the March 30^th meeting of the Brattleboro Rotary Club held at the American Legion in Brattleboro. Since the Red Sox opener is in four days, Cindy Jerome led the crowd in a rendition of “Take Me Out to The Ball Game” for an invocation. . This was followed by the pledge of allegiance.

As a luncheon of corned beef and cabbage and gluten-free cupcakes for desert was being digested, the meeting continued.

As a luncheon of chicken, pulled pork, tortellini, corn, salad, and cake with spumoni for dessert was being digested, the meeting continued.

Guests: Visiting Rotarian Burl Penton (Leland, NC), Ace Reporter Mike Faher, and Paul Paradis (speaker).

TRIVIA QUESTION

In the 116-year history of the Red Sox, how many opening day games have been won?

(answer below)

JOKE / SONG OF THE WEEK

For our Rotary joke, Martin Cohn told the following male blonde jokes to counter the female blonde jokes told by Chuck Cummings last month.

A blond man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: "Did you find the shampoo?" He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it's for dry hair, and I've just wet mine."

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A blond man spies a letter lying on his doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND." He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.
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A blond man shouts frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" Is this her first child?" asks the Doctor. "No!" he shouts, "this is her husband!"
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An Italian tourist asks a blond man: "Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?" To which the blond man replies: "If they fell forward, they'd still be in the boat."
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A friend told the blond man: "Christmas is on a Friday this year." The blond man then said, "Let's hope it's not the 13th."
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Two blond men find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station. One asked: "What if one explodes before we get there?" The other says: "We'll lie and say we only found two."
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A woman phoned her blond neighbor man and said: "Close your curtains the next time you and your wife are having sex. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday." To which the blond man replied: "Well the joke's on all of you because I wasn't even at home yesterday!

ROTARY MINUTE

For our Rotary Minute, Jim Haine reminded us about the ease of making up meetings by using Rotary’s eclubs. To learn more about , click here.

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At our April 6^th meeting, Tom French will tell a joke or lead us in song, while Jody Haley delivers a Rotary Minute.

UPCOMING PROGRAMS

04/06 – Presented by Sandy Rouse: Lissa Weinman, 118 Elliot Street
04/13 – Club Assembly – International Committee Update
04/20 – Presented by Bill McKim: Elsie Smith, NECCA
04/27 – Presented by Ana Saavedra: TBA
05/04 – Presented by Ron Stahley: TBA
05/11 – Presented by Marcy Jones: Lt. Anthony French & Trooper James Matthews, State Police Update

NOTE: Weekly assignments (program, joke, and Rotary minute) are posted on club’s website.

FINES

NONE ;-(

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Ricky Davidson was inducted as club’s newest member.
Don’t forget to introduce yourself to Wendy Harrison and Aaron Rich so that you don’t have to take “the walk of shame.”
Art Greenbaum is recovering nicely.
Save the date --- June 8^th is the Brattleboro Rotary Club Golf Tournament. For more details see committee chair Cathy Coonan or co-chair Gina Pattison.
Bowl for Kid’s Sake is on Saturday, April 1.
If you attended last week’s Roadshow, please contact Rhonda Calhoun.

BRAGS

Stan Nowakoski – for the club’s response for volunteers at the 4/12 Overflow Shelter.

Mara Williams – for club member’s who bring their bottles and cans to Putney Redemption Center.

Phil Steckler – for helping to sell Putney Redemption Center to new owners.

Mara Williams – for Brattleboro being her real home.

Jeff Hagstrom – for Fred Moriarty’s singing at club meeting.

Jeff Hagstrom – for Bill McKim organizing last week’s roadshow.

Jeff Hagstrom – for skiing with his grandson at Okemo.

Jeff Hagstrom – for photo of his grandson, Sam, in paper as Head Coach of Hinsdale Softball team.

Cindy Jerome – for the accuracy of Mike Faher’s reporting.

Cindy Jerome – for her son, Ben, entering the UVM Arts & Teaching Program.

Cindy Jerome – for the Bradley House selecting Trumbull Nelson as general contractors.

Rich Carroll – for Governor Scott having the good sense to selected Karen Russell Carroll to serve on the Vermont Supreme Court.

Steve Gordon - for Ricky Davidson’s work at Boys & Girls Club.

John Kohler – for being in 3^rd place in fundraising for Bowl for Kids Sake.

Jenifer Ambler – for the club quickly fielding a team for Bowl for Kids Sake.

Robin Sweetapple – for Rob Szpila and Rich Carroll’s efforts in the Boys & Girl Club’s demo project.

Cathy Coonan – for her two-week vacation to St. Martin during the snow storm.

Burl Penton – for the club’s having brags instead of “happy dollars”

Burl Penton – for Brattleboro having a snow storm while he’s here from North Carolina.

Sandy Rouse – for the Boys & Girls Club Literary Slam on April 22.

George Weir – for his son competing in Woodstock bike race in the snow.

Phil Steckler – for remaining married during the renovation of three bathrooms.

George Anthes – for VSECU donating $2600 to Groundworks.

Andy Rome – for Wells Fargo donating $10,000 to Boys & Girls Club

PROGRAM:

Andy Rome presented Paul Paradis, Entergy Nuclear Decommissioning Director who told us about decommissioning a nuclear power plant. For more info, click here.

REMINDERS

Bottles and cans can be brought to Putney Road redemption center to benefit Pure Water for the World. Please see Mara Williams.
“Like” the club’s Facebook page.
If you like this newsletter, brag at next Club meeting. Update, to date there have been no brags. Either you do not like this newsletter or you are aren't reading it.

This bulletin was respectfully submitted by Past President Martin Cohn who attempts to give a gist of the meeting. However, it is always better to attend. If you have any complaints about the contents of this bulletin....

ANSWER TO TRIVIA QUESTION

69 (59%)

For more info, click here.